October 2009
0 posts
11 tags
September 2009
13 posts
28 tags
10 tags
Goat entrails for emergency truck repair?
The truck blows fuses at night, again. Fixed it the first time with electric tape and a bigger fuse. But not now. I chant, spread goat entrails on the hood, burn candles. With intermittent outages of my instrument panel and trailer lights, I try new remedies in many scenic parking lots. My 3 hour drive covers 50 miles.
Hello, motel. The hallway echoes every step, every word, every door closing....
9 tags
16 tags
How do you style your hair? With a hand grenade?
“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA,” the insult clown says. “Look, the guy’s laughing along, even though his father tragically was a Brillo pad. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.”
The clown doesn’t pause. “Hey, little girl holding the big man’s hand. Do you feel like a blimp handler in the Macy’s parade? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.” (“Hey, little girl. What’s it like to ride...
Responses from readers
Re “How did you style your hair … (insult clown): HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I think (the insult clown) is the right one for the job. I watched the video, and couldn’t tell if you can actually see him behind the screen???? (Yes, you can.) He’s far superior to the next clown on YouTube (“really mean clown”), who is obnoxious w/out being funny. It does make a difference,...
8 tags
A hot dog invented in Altoona? You'd think it...
— comment by a reader
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Now you can comment
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Eventually, I might set up a more normal commenting format.
12 tags
Just another day: demolition derby, waterfalls,...
Actual good news from Disaster Dave. Here’s his good day, sometimes they happen:
Saw 11 waterfalls on a 6-mile hike in spectacularly nice weather. (Won’t describe something you can’t get.)
In a nearby town, finally found inexpensive, high-top, turf cleats (it’s a big deal, trust me).
While watching fireworks at the fair, had homemade pierogies from a church’s food...
17 tags
Danger Mouth: Politics, Sex, Religion
Disaster Dave says a day with three brand-new situations rattled his ad lib expertise.
Driving his mobile unit past the county Democrats’ pie booth, Dave is hungry. So the puppet says, “Hey, Democrats. Got any apple rhubarb pie? (No answer.) What, you’re not accustomed to talking to puppets? After the Bush years, I figured you would be. (That last remark hesitated only briefly...
14 tags
Detritus Delight Us
This summer I’ve already eaten and liked: 1) a Cuban sandwich that looked exactly like a half-smoked cigar (at Moto restaurant in Chicago); 2) a peanut butter sandwich with lettuce — my Indiana hosts insisted; 3) In desperation one morning, I had Diet Mountain Dew on my Grapenuts — tastes like weak fruit juice. So I’ve eaten it again, but only when I can’t get orange...
9 tags
NASCAR GPS: Turn left, turn left ...
I run two GPS units simultaneously because they’re both squirrelly schizo in their own unique ways. Welcome to the skewed world of the GPS in my Samsung Instinct (Sprint) and my Rightway RW200 (first GPS by a new company).
Rightway also sells a Dale Earnhardt Jr. model. “Turn left, turn left, turn left …”
Some maps on my RW200 are so old that search results recently said, “See clay tablet in...